I just thought I’d point it out right here at the start: this is fiction, and doesn’t (necessarily, anyway) reflect any of my personal thoughts or beliefs, although I do find a bit of a trend towards that general sort of viewpoint.
I was nothing, floating in and on a sea of nothingness; I was part of the sea, I made no difference in it, I was just one of the nothings that had accumulated there, the nothings that comprised the entire universe. Nothing differentiated me from anything else, and I no longer had any grasp upon what the simple word – letter, actually – “I” could even mean anymore. I had known, once, but what was knowing, anymore?
I could hear the whispers of thoughts of the other bits of nothingness that comprised everything around me; thoughts of those other “people”, though they were certainly no longer such. Everything was everyone, and everything was nothing.
I had a few scarce memories that remained, but what were memories, anyway? Just falsified bits of either truths or lies – they were all the same, now. They each held equal significance, and that significance was nothing. Nothing was everything, and everything was nothing.
I suppose you may suspect me to be in a perpetual state of depression, but I hold you against from making such assumptions. There are no “states”, where I am. We (the separations between each member of the nothingness being merely arbitrarily placed) only are, and that is all. That is enough. Nonexistence has no need for “states” of being. Any delusion of such things is merely a crack in the system, a random, chaotic signal. I know I cannot feel anything, nor can anyone else, and I am glad of this.
But, what if, you ask, my very nihilistic view (the only reasonable view in this universe, certainly) is one of those random glitches? Perhaps my very view is disproven by itself?
Perhaps, perhaps. It is impossible to “know”, because there is no “knowing”. Every bit of me screams this truth, and I hear the whispers of “others” (we are all the same) who think it, too.
What’s odd is that this is the one view that all beliefs can accept, in a way. For atheists it is easiest, in a way. If all substance came from nothing, then all is nothing. There is no meaning, aside from small things that we can “discover”, “learn”, “believe”, before we are once again re-absorbed into true nothingness once more.
Those with religions can see the truth as well; if there was a “god” (capitalized or otherwise, plural or otherwise), who created everything and everyone, whether “he” or “she” personally watches over everything that happens, or, as the deists see it, merely set the universe going and let it run by itself, there is no substance to life. The mere existence of a god wipes out all substance of other existence. This viewpoint may not be the basis of all “believer’s” day-to-day existence, but it still exists, somewhere in their mind.
Of course, none of this has any substance. We exist separate from it all, now, and there is no changing in that. Has it ever been any different? Nothing, drifting to and fro within nothing. I do not think it has. Then again, what do my thoughts have to do with anything?